Proxi He · Confidence coach for men
You've promised yourself you wouldn't react that way again. And then you did. You know you're shutting down, pulling back, going somewhere your partner can't follow — and you can't find the way back. These moments have names, and they have patterns, and there are concrete things you can do about them. Proxi He is where that work happens.
Real-time support the moment you need it.
40 free messages · no credit card
What's actually going on
Most men were never given a vocabulary for what they feel. You learned to push through, stay focused, and handle it. And most of the time, that works. But there's a version of stress that doesn't lift when the project ends. A kind of irritability that surprises even you. A disconnection in the relationships that matter most that you can't quite explain or fix by just trying harder.
Those things have names, and they have patterns, and there are concrete things you can do about them. The problem isn't willpower or attitude. It's that no one ever gave you the tools or the language to work with what's actually happening underneath the surface.
Proxi He does that. It meets you where you are, gives you words for what you're carrying, and helps you figure out what to do next. No appointments, no waiting rooms, no starting over from the beginning every time. Just the conversation you actually need, when you need it — real-time support the moment you need it.
You know these moments
You walk through the front door and your partner reads your face before you say a word — and the whole night shifts because of it.
You're sitting in your car in the driveway trying to decompress before you walk inside — and it doesn't work.
You feel the anger building in your chest, you know exactly what's coming, and you can't find the brake.
Built on real work
John earned his doctorate in psychology from UC Berkeley and has spent 30 years translating research and coaching into tools men can actually use. He consulted on Pixar's Inside Out, coached leaders at Meta, Stanford, Airbnb, and Bank of America, and his courses have had over 20,000 students across the world. His micro-courses on anger and forgiveness reached nearly 200,000 listens in their first year.
Proxi He is built on that body of work — not a generic AI wellness product, but a specific, grounded point of view about what men need and how change actually happens. When you talk to Proxi He, you're working with John's frameworks, his research, and his way of cutting straight through to what's really going on.
How it works
Proxi He is a real conversation, not a script or a sequence of prompts. You show up however you are, say what's actually going on, and it responds to that specifically. What happens next depends entirely on what you need.
You describe what's happening — the irritability, the shutdown, the thing you keep saying you'll deal with. Proxi He reflects back what's actually going on beneath the surface: the pattern, the operating system, the thing that keeps producing the same outcome. Not a diagnosis. A mirror.
There's a conversation you've been avoiding, or one that went sideways and left things unresolved. Proxi He can help you think through the dynamic, work out what you actually want to communicate, and find words that land — before you're in the middle of it.
Drawn from Dr. John's 30 years of work with men, Proxi He shares real examples of men navigating the same pressure, the same loops, the same relational moments. Sometimes hearing how someone else moved through it is what finally makes it land differently.
Not every session needs to be a deep dive. A quick emotional pulse check takes three minutes and often reveals more than you expected. The more consistently you show up, the more Proxi He learns the patterns that run your life — and the more precisely it can help you work with them.
Growth you can see
Proxi He is the only coach on the platform with a full progression system built in. Every conversation earns you experience across nine areas of development. As you grow, you move through six levels, earn track badges, and build a visible record of real work.
Earn XP and unlock badges across stress regulation, anger awareness, emotional intelligence, thought patterns, relationship skills, identity, and more. Your badge gallery fills as you build it.
The science of behavior change is clear: consistency matters more than intensity. Proxi He rewards you for showing up regularly, because that's when the real shifts happen and actually stick.
Badges like Zen Master, Relational Hero, and Evolved Man aren't handed out easily. They mark the kind of sustained work that actually changes how you think, feel, and act under pressure.
Most growth is invisible. The progression system makes it visible, so you can see how far you've come and what you're still building toward. The work shows up. So does the man doing it.
What you'll work on
These aren't abstract topics. They're the patterns that show up in everyday life, in your work, your relationships, and your sense of who you are and where you're going.
When the pressure doesn't let up, most men push harder. Proxi He helps you understand what's actually driving the stress, why you can't just shake it off, and what to do instead of running on empty until something gives.
Irritability that comes out of nowhere. A short fuse that surprises even you. Proxi He gives you language for what's underneath the anger and tools for catching it before it costs you something important.
The conversations that always go sideways, the things that keep not getting said, the disconnection you can feel but can't quite fix. Proxi He helps you understand the patterns underneath and figure out how to actually get through to each other.
You've done everything right on paper and something still feels off. Proxi He is built for the moment when the external markers of success stop being enough and you start asking what you actually want your life to look like.
In John's words
Not the corporate wellness version. Not generic coaching language with a PhD attached to it. Proxi He is built to respond the way I actually respond in a coaching conversation: naming the pattern you're in, asking the question that cuts through it, and giving you something real to do next. Not a list of suggestions, not a pep talk. Something concrete.
Proxi He isn't a substitute for working with me directly, and I want to be straight about that. But most of the real work doesn't happen in a formal coaching session. It happens at 11pm on a Tuesday when your mind won't shut off. It happens before the hard conversation you've been avoiding for three days. It happens when something feels off and you can't name it yet. That's what Proxi He is built for — real-time support the moment you need it.
When you're ready to go deeper, the Group Coaching plan adds live biweekly Zoom calls with me into the mix. Same ecosystem, a different level of human accountability and connection.
Get closer
These aren't abstract outcomes. They're the specific shifts that happen when you start working with what's actually going on underneath.
Get closer to walking through the door and feeling your whole body exhale instead of brace.
Get closer to knowing what you're actually feeling before it comes out sideways.
Get closer to staying in the hard conversation instead of shutting it down.
Get closer to hearing your partner without immediately defending yourself.
Get closer to catching the moment before you react — and making a different choice.
Get closer to your kids getting the best of you, not what's left of you.
Plans & Pricing
Start with Proxi or add live biweekly group coaching with Dr. John. All plans are month-to-month with no contracts. Real-time support the moment you need it.
Regular price $29/mo
Cancel anytime · no contracts
Regular price $147/mo
Cancel anytime · no contracts
40 free messages · no credit card
Private by design. What you share is never used to train AI models, and your conversations are automatically deleted after 30 days by default. Privacy Policy →
